Friday, November 25, 2011

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

In My Silence

Why do people act like they are your God when you work for them? ( Day 1)
I kept quiet and didnt give a reply.

Silence Is Golding

I am inspired to write on my blog today. Yeaaaahhhhh Me!!!!. 

God is teaching me something special and wonderful. I get into the habit of talking too much sometimes. Everyone that knows me personally would know that I am a free spirit. I talk to every one and hardly take anything personal. Nowadays, I feel like the Lord is telling me to keep quiet. There is beauty in silence. I need to be more lay back and just watch. Sometimes, in our silence we can tell people's true behavior. Keeping quiet saves you from a lot of trouble, the bible tells us that whoso keepeth his mouth and his tongue keepeth his soul from troubles ( Proverbs 21 vs 23). Keeping quite will help me to forcus on my life and get me studying for my GMAT so I am going on a one month quiet time, no unnecessary conversation. It is time to direct all my talkativeness to the Lord (so help me God)

Saturday, May 7, 2011

I really don't know where to start from. It been such a long time since I wrote on my blog. I miss everyone and I cant wait to update you. 

1) I still work at the same place. 
2) I got to meet my boyfriend in person (FYI He is better in person).
3) I got an internship with Bank Of New York ( I know na God). 
4) Still in my expensive apartment but it is high time I start boxing my stuff. 
5) In the process of planing my trip to ATL for a new passport (should I drive or just fly there) 

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Why Are You Offended? Why Are You Bitter? What Is That Issue That Keeps You Up? Are You Lost?

I ask you as a friend why are you offended my dear?  Do you not know that God is watching you and how long do you intend to stay offended? She said to me "child don't you know that we still have to take the bad debt exam? You should have seen my face. I grew all defensive and offended. Hey who are u calling a child, I asked and you could see immediately that she didn't mean it in the wrong way at all. But why did I take offense? Many of you might find that dramatic, The truth is that most of us do the same thing on a daily basis. Ponder on that for a minute or two. As  human we have the tendency to snap and take offense at others words or actions.

To Be Continued

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Kemi's Thought

Can we ever be sure the other person loves us the way we love them? In my current state of mind I have to say no. Deep down someone will always love more than the other. It is all a risk we take with our heart. I ponder on this thought sometimes and wonder if it is meant to be this way. The only person we know about is ourself, so we should love others to our fullest abilities.

School starts tomorrow again and am not looking forward to going back to  busy busy Kemi. I will try to write  here on my free time. 

List of to do's by 8:00am tomorrow
1)  Finance home work.
2) Business ethic chapter preparation.
3) Operation research chapter 3 assignment. 
4) Intermediate accounting ( Bank reconciliation statement assigned chapter)
5) Sleep 

God help me, all this needs to be done tonight :( I wonder what I have been doing all spring break. 

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Disappointment Lies And Trust

When was the last disappointed that left you feeling hopeless? What happened? When was the last time someone lied to you??? Did this lie affect your actions? Can you trust them again?                            
If you are like me, it would be that you  get disappointed at least ones a month. Some are just more intense than others. My last disappointed was this scholarship I applied for. The rejection letter came as a bullet to  my heart. I put so much effort into this application and even sent it overnight with delivery confirmation through UPS ( just so you know it cos me $45 to mail this package), So getting a formal rejection letter disguised as an acceptance wasn't so funny. This is just an example, many of us might have experienced worst, however, we all have to accept this disappointment one way or the other. Some people take it likely while some don't, depending on the level of importances. I remember any time things did not go my mom's way she would always tell us that "Every disappointment is a blessing" this brought her so much comfort and in a way it was instilled in me. It is a very positive way to look at disappointments in life. Expect a testimony or a blessing after every disappointment "it is written, eyes hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man. the things which God hath prepared for them that love Him" (I Corinthians 2 vs 9). Just because a door closes does not mean all hope is lost, as a matter of fact some doors have to be closed for the others to open up."When I was a younger Christian I use to shout on top for open doors but have gotten older, I have learnt to rejoice on closed doors because closed doors are not just rejections, closed doors are divine re-directions...Paul Adefaransin " we ought  to rejoice at disappointment cos it alway almost  mean that God has better things in store for us and he is moving us  ahead.  Our dreams are sometimes too small/little that its irritates God. The scholarship for me might have been for $3000 but I know God has a scholarship of $100000 ahead of me. In your darkest disappointment please see Jesus working things out for the better. 
      Lies upon lies, we all hate to be told a lie but most of us think it is ok if we are the ones telling the lie.  Hippocrates???  I can even imagine getting so upset at others for lying to me, in some cases, the lies are unnecessary because I already know the truth. So how far is too far? When do we draw a line? Is it ok for a person to tell lies ones in a while? Does lying  make one a liar? I think lying is unacceptable but sometime I fall short. Let he that is without a sin cast the first stone. Whether we remember the last lie we told or not, it would be difficult for one to prove they have never lied. When we lie we sin against God. Amazing grace amazing love, that when we come to total repentance of our sins He is ready to forgive us. This doesn't mean we should continue lying.  Yellow, green, red or white a lie is a sin. The major point here is how we forgive people that lie to us and begin to build  trust in them again.  If our heavenly father forgives us and wipes our slate clean why cant we do the same and move on? 
    You might be thinking  that is different. Is it? Building trust in someone is not an easy thing especially, when they continue to fail and fall short. Who is perfect? nobody, take the matter to the Lord in prayer, commit this person into the hands of the Lord. God has a purpose for every person and you can be sure that no matter how they run, the Lord is still in control. Make a list of the people you want to see change. Soul a seed in their life by praying for them. Learn to begin building trust again and I pray the Lord will help us with this difficult task. 

Movie recommendation 

The Costly Games

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Broken Heart??? Its Over Now :( Let It Go!!!

Onces upon a time, I use to love this man. I gave him my all, he was the prefect man for me. There was nothing wrong and It took so much of my energy and time. It was everything I ever hoped for. The relationship was prefect at least I thought. Until, it all came crashing down, within a blink of an eye we were arguing  and it felt like our best days were behind us. You bet he stepped back and just gave up on the relationship. I remember crying and talking to myself,  why was this happening to me?  we were suppose to be getting married and having kids lol......... In the first month of the relationship. I opened a  book that told me that it wasn't going to work because I wasn't ready for it. OMG!!! I thought the author was ridiculous, his he God and how can he predict such a stupid thing?  I closed the book. Now its like ok you were right. I have to say it was not all horrible, we had our good times. I mean he was that special person to me then.  At the end of it all I was heart broken.  I lived through it and moved on.  I just got into that place where I couldnt trust any other person with my heart, I will get close to another guy and just run because I was afraid of getting hurt. Many at time i will stay close to the old guy just because I couldn't move on. I tell u it was hard, normal became odd. I totally lost myself in the relationship that I would blank out in my mind and the first word of revival would be his name. I remember calling another guy is name while on a date ( super weird and embarrassing). Oh did i tell u? I will go to my car and sit there for hours just browsing through past emails and conversation when things were good and cry so hard. finally I moved on even though it was hard. The three major things I did to move on was  to move closer to God, keep busy and distribute my number to guys. slowly it got better by the day, I read my bible more and read books online. I also set a schedule for myself, gave every part of my day a task. I stayed longer at school and at work, did work that  wasn't assigned and impacted my community in a positive way. Finally,I gave out my number to every guy that cared to have it. It wasn't really the best because they were all rebounds and just to fill that attention I needed but  ended up making valuable friendship. I guess the whole point is that Life does not end when someone walks out of your Life. Guess what am back in the game, happily dating ( oh yahhh!!!)  Please Move On Already!!! I pray the Lord will heal our broken heart where ever it hurt (Amen)

 Here are some devotional words from the Bishop T.D. Jakes to help a broken heart understand that it is useless crying over spilled milk: 
There are people who can walk away from you.
And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk.

I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you,  loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone and move on.

When people can walk away from you,  let them walk.
Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.

People leave you because they are not joined to you.  And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay.
People leave you because they are not attached to you. And if they are not attached to you, you can't make them stay.
People leave you because they weren't born with you. And if they weren't born with you, you can't make them stay.

And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person, it just means that their part in the story is over.
And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead.

You've got to know when it's dead.
You've got to know when it's over.

Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye.
It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me.
And if it takes too much sweat,  I don't need it.
Stop begging people to stay.

Going Somewhere? Hate The Road Blocks? Take A Detour

Over the past years, I have come to realize that it is ok to take a detour to get to where you ought to be. I come from a society where failure is apparent and unacceptable. Growing up, I examined lot of  people and would instantly decide that  would never be me, for instance I use to know this lady that was just flat out ungirly ( is that even a word) and I would say to myself, I will never grow up like that. Failure to me is very unacceptable and I constantly sit to evaluate my life. I remember one night I cried so hard for hours because of a decision I made in my life (quiting nursing and starting over with accounting). No one to help, no one to blame, I felt like I did the right thing but, at the same time I wasn't ready to face the consequences. It meant another two or three years of college.  I developed a coping skill to never think about it and to consider myself a freshman ( first day at school, first day in class). I must say it worked for the most part but when alone I pull up the curriculum in my head and  calculate the years. It just made me sad. Doing this all over again made the whole college experience boring. I consider myself  flexible, I am able to handle what ever life throws at me with the help of God. The truth is that we can plan and schedule everything in life thinking we have control but only God can control the moment. From my experience in life, it is ok to take a detour every now and then cos in the end we are human and are allowed to. It is not really about the failures of life but the way we move on from the failures. I hope to graduate in May 2012 with a bachelor degree in accounting and also a minor in Biology ( because of my nursing background). There is a high chance that I might end up in nursing school to complete what I started. After all, it was not a failure it was a smart decision to have two different career path, I would always be able to work with either degrees. At the end of the day it all comes together. Never worry about tomorrow because tomorrow will take care of itself. There is nothing wrong with taking a detour!!!! I pray that the Lord will turn our failure to success. (Amen)

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Waiting On The Lord

There are  so many things I wonder and worry about, things I cannot change. Sometime I get so frustrated at God and feel so helpless. The truth is that the Lord has given us the power to overcome such situations. The Lord has power over everything that goes on in the world and He will surely make your path straight in no time. When i was younger ma problems was what to wear and if my mom would show early to pick me up. Cloth always came one way or the other and my mom would always show up to pick me up. Now that am older i feel like ma issues are a little more than that and i seem to have forgotten how to have faith. In church this Sunday the pastor talked about how our faith should be based on the Lord and his only spirit and not the report of the world. There comes a time in a person's life that one is down to nothing the report is just like the world would end surely enough the time always comes and passes. I remember when i was in MN, I was just so tired of everything around me. I would imagine myself in another life because I thought i couldn't have it any worst but the Lord came through for me. He lifted me out of MN and placed me in a better setting. Even when I got a scholarship to go to nursing skool and i lost it. How was i going to afford this tuition? it seems so impossible and even quiting nursing school was like a bad decision but the Lord still stood by me and got me another scholarship to pay my tuition. The same God that came to my aid is still able. The Lord strong and mighty is able. He is so so able, I just have to wait a little longer. Come to think about it God has been faithful even when i have been so very unfaithful. The bible says that  those who wait on the Lord shall renew there strength, The shall work and not be weary. For this I am going to wait on you Lord and let u direct me. I pray the Lord will give us all the grace to wait on HIM...

Psa. 27:14 Wait for the Lord; Be strong, and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

January 1 Lesson

So I rededicated my life to Christ yesterday and it was so awesome. I have been dying to do so but I just always wondered what people would say and who was looking. I finally got the courage to do it and to account for my daily walk with the Lord I started this blog. In the past I have done so in private and fallen back into my sinful nature, but this time around I want it to count for good. I pray that the Lord will draw me closer to himself (Amen). This blog is dedicated to my walk and new beginnings with the Lord.

Yesterday I read John 1 and 2

John 1: It talked about the beginning, It is amazing to know that even before the earth was created God was here. Just sit back and think of this one more time. Imagine the world with no sharp, no light, no dark, no form, no issues nothing but the Lord our God. I picture Him in white siting in an empty place. God is good.
Then the verse moved to talking about John the baptist. He was sent to the world to prepare the way for Jesus. He had a purpose in life and it was to prepare the way for our Lord Jesus Christ. What struck me the most when I finish reading this verse was the spirit of humility that John had towards Christ. "I baptize with water John replied, but among you stands one you do not know, He is the one who comes after me, the straps of whose sandals I am not worthy to untie". I pray the Lord takes away every element of pride in me and replace it with a humble spirit.

John 2. It was Christ first miracle, He turn water to wine. I think this is super cool, Jesus is indeed a miracle worker. After meditating i thought of how easy it was for Him, and I remember how much easier it is  for Him to turn our sorrows into laughter.. I pray that the Lord will turn our deepest sorrows and problems into joy and blessings. It is time to go to bed so I say gudnite blog.